I Love You, Mommy

Happy Birthday. 

I was searching for words to say about you, and for you. My eyes began to fill with tears. I realized then that whenever I really think about you and what you've done, how you've lived your life for me, I cannot help but cry; my heart cannot hold such vast quantity of emotion and so bubbles over.  

My next thought was "why... do these eyes... of mine cry?" And I laughed! Funny how one phrase can conjure so many memories, isn't it? I decided that that is what I wanted say-- the memories I have of being with you.  Just this one is your birthday gift, then:

We were driving up Timpview Drive in the old Reliant listening to 94.1 when that song -- that you came to call my song-- came on for the first time. I think I was nine or ten, and you were driving me to dance class. You turned the volume up and sang "I wake up in the morning and I wonder." The music was SO cheesy, and SO scoopy,  and even twangy, but you seemed to love it. I thought that was slightly odd since you usually seem to have good taste in music.  I decided that it must have been a fluke.  You said -- hang on! -- it would get better. And then, oh man! Then Skeeter Davis started to talk, (had to google that name-- didn't know it until a few minutes ago, but what kind of a name is Skeeter, anyway?) she started to talk and I totally lost it laughing. You did too. Gasping for air, we repeated those spoken phrases until tears were streaming down our faces.  And for years after that moment (one peculiar passing moment) every time that song came on the radio we jacked up the volume and belted our drama act to the velveteen seat cushions. You'd grin to me and say, "Hey, Rach! They're playing your song."  

And now just remembering, sitting on my living room couch, with you so far away, tears are again streaming down my face. I love you so! 

It's hard to speak my heart. I feel so much; the emotion is too great to describe! Too wondrous and perfect to imprison with words. All I can say, dearest Mother, is that I owe you so much more than my life. I love you so much more than my heart. And that I could never have designed a better friend, a more understanding Lady, a more loving or wiser woman to be my mother!  I am so glad that you are my mother. For all that you are, and all you have been, I wish to bless you on your birthday. For you have always blessed me. 

Also remember today that you may have grown older, but you still aren't allowed to be old. Ha. Not until I'm married with three children. :) If I were in Houston I'd make you cheesecake, but you and Alicia are already on top of that. I hope it turns out just dandy with that spanking new springform pan of your'n.