Road Trip

Ansel Adams, "Road, Nevada Desert"

All aboard! Next stop, Texas! 

Actually, it's Arches National Park, Carlsbad Caverns, Albuquerque, and then Texas, but you get the idea. I'm on the road again. *Rachel begins quietly humming "On the Road Again" to herself* Hopefully while I'm driving I'll still have time to post some stuff. If not, I'll be seeing you. *Rachel begins to sing...rather loudly...once again, to herself*

Lagoon Day

I don't know why I bother, since no one appears to read this anyway, but on the off chance that my Mom will still see this-- there is a purpose! Thank you, Mother, you're the only one who loves me... aha aha. Well, Mom, and Arnie the All-ee-gay-tohr, but not the point. 

The point is that I spent all day Friday with some friends at Lagoon (Utah's one and only theme park). See, Utah doesn't need more theme parks than that cause we have more national parks than any other state--so there. Anyway. Yeah. Lagoon! 

There's a ride there called "Wicked" that is definitely a trip. (See pictures above.)  It only lasts a minute because it's really really fast, but the tower is 110 ft tall and you kind of can't breathe even after you stop moving. I was still shaking from adrenaline for two minutes after my feet were on the ground again, which was kind of frightening on its own since the next ride Kasey and Mike dragged me on was ...dun dun dun... 

SKYCOASTER. Yeah. You know that archway thing people harness themselves to with the little wire that pulls them 150 ft in the air and then drops them to hurtle toward the ground at (believe me on this, I did the research) 50--80 mph? (A cheetah can only run 45 mph, so yeah, this is fast.) Yes, that Skycoaster. 

I can personally verify that the drop, while gleeful after a point, is sheer terror to begin with. During the ascent I was so freaked out that I started to ramble off ingredients to cheesecake and buttermilk-biscuits just to keep my mind off the ground falling away beneath my feet. That was a surprise defense mechanism that I didn't know I'd rely on-- but hey, whatever works. And! Wanna know what I didn't expect? That there is slack in the line for the first 60 feet of falling *gah!* during which your "controlled" plummet is a NOSE DIVE. 

--insert bloodcurdling scream--

--truly believe that your ultimate demise could be seconds away--

--nope, still screaming--

--feel tension come back into the line again, take a breath, scream some more--

--hurtle forward instead of down--

ahhhhhhhhhhnd NOW begin to enjoy yourself. 

In sum, Lagoon was fun. Completely wonderful, actually. Even considering that I was the only one who got soaked during Rattlesnake rapids, that it was pouring rain while we were on the top of the WildMouse ride (Kasey and I really thought we could slip off and die during those hairpin turns), and that I actually was frightened inside the campy-predictable-haunted-castle ride.... 

it was completely wonderful. 

And you know what? I've decided that no matter how awesome any roller coasters may be, none will ever be more enjoyable than the swings. 

Toodleoo.

R is for Recycling

My opinion on the most important of "the three R's" of Recycling?

Reduce-REUSE-Recycle.

Above & Beyond, a London company, is reusing upholstery fabric from old Underground seats to make shoes. This example is from the Piccadilly line.



The shoes are rather expensive. But they come in a riot of different colors that snag the eye. Plus, I totally dig the box.

Shopping With Mom

Dear Mom,

If I could, today I'd take you and Miss Kate to FuzzotFurniture to browse. I know just what would happen! Together we would critique and salivate, you and Kate would explain to me how everything was built, and then we'd turn a corner, collectively gasp at something and say "ooooh, that's a great piece."

Old Radio Show

If mystery radio shows were still on the air, I might be tempted to "forget" my ipod when I drive. Who could forget that deep announcer voice (with incredible diction especially for the airwaves) when he said,

"Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The weed of crime bears bitter fruit. Who knows? The Shadow knows ... "

*aaaaaaand... cue Saint-Saens' theme music*

Mark My Words, Melissa's Going to be Jealous

Yesterday I took a long, extended hike to Stewart Falls. I say "extended" because I took the trail from Aspen Grove, but didn't remember where it started and had to guess, and by guess I really mean climb up a hillside hoping to encounter the trail--"ah! there it is! it is back that way!" *smirk.* But the trail I found was actually 100 feet shy the altitude of the one I sought. I found the horse trail. Which was fine--never been on that one before--but it was extreeeeeeeemely muddy and much longer. Either way, still worth it.

I'm not sure I've mentioned this, but June brought unusual weather to Provo this year. "Rain twice a day! for two [weeks!] oh Wally, come back!" No, seriously-- rain everyday for two weeks--no joke. Whoa it was weird. Provo NEVER gets that much rain. Well, not in my living memory anyway, and certainly not in June. Why am I even mentioning this?

The. Falls. Were. Huge.

Swelled with both the rain and spring run-off (that summer has just barely been hot enough to produce,) Stewart Falls was bigger (by water flow) than I've ever seen before; so large that I must assume my Bernadette Peters voice to describe it. "Bigger. Much bigger. Much, MUCH BIGGER! Sooooo big...." that the mist hit me from a dozen yards away. So big that the rocks around the falls were all saturated-- even the ones on the side that you usually can sit on. And get this-- more water is coming out of Stewart Falls per hour than through Bridal Veil*. Whoa, dang, that there is a surprise.


Which brings me to another point. Deer Creek is at 100% capacity, and they've even been draining more out of it than usual. The pipes through the Canyon are draining water straight down the cliffs cause they're trying to get rid of it all. Utah Lake is at 101% capacity**. Provo River is overflowing in some places, and swelling its banks at most. I've never seen it so full! Tangent over, sorry.

I just wanted to tell you all about my jaunt through the aspen and fir wooded mountainside. My trek held wildflowers aplenty, fountains of bird song (with even a raven to caw at me), refreshing breezes, and just the right amount of sunshine. It was all so nice! And it smelled great, too.


What I think I liked best of all was the quiet. How glorious to be away from noise! Computers whirring, diswashers/washers'n'dryers churning, air conditioning turning on, too-loud conversation, cars passing in the street, TV's being on, raucous party music from the apt next door, and etcetera, altogether simultaneous cacophony is what I hear everyday. Upon reflection, methinks I'll be hearing the canyon calling me a little more frequently. I am "in my natural habitat; more at home here amongst the birds, the trees, and the flowers than in Vienna." To sum up, it was lovely, I breathed deeply, and exhaled many exclamations of...

""OHHHHH FOR THE JOY OF THE MOUNTAIN AIR!"

*according to the NRCS National Water and Climate Center, and my eyeballs which made me think to check the stats in the first place.
**Southeastern Utah isn't getting as much water as the rest of the state, but hey-- Lake Powell is expected to rise 17 feet this year, and that's not shabby!
***I dare you to name all of the quotes in this post. Alicia might be the only one who can do it.
****If you don't understand the geographical locations mentioned in this post, I humbly apologize. It's just that I mainly write this for my family who doesn't live in town with me anymore, and they'll know the lay of the land, so to speak.

"Caught in Friederic's Teeth"

I cut my finger open a few days ago and kept thinking of this. Afraid of infection, I was careful to use a band-aid. After all, everyone knows "let a cut go and you invite infection, amputation, or even death!" 

MMechanix Magazine, Sept 1934

Whoa, Ugly!

...it's a play on words. Get it? Whoa, Ugly!

Is Anyone As Excited As Me? Likely Not.

My favorite part is the frog doing the Charleston. Be sure to note that the "witch doctor" looks like Prince.

DISCO

Your jaw will drop. Guaranteed.

My darling, my honey, my ragtime gal

I never leave home without her. Here she is; the baby I call, "Trident blue."



I always have some with me. No, really. I do. I get my supply from Costco. Yeah, I buy this stuff in bulk. For the last two years I've had multiple packs of gum on hand (I took a whole case with me to Jerusalem, and everyone wanted some), and you can bet I intend to continue this practice. For reasons of both hygiene, and practicality.

Did you know that "the physical action of chewing Trident sugar-free gums for 20 minutes after eating stimulates saliva flow, which helps to prevent cavities by reducing plaque acids and strengthening teeth"? My family and I inherited some nasty enamel-- thanks, Dad--and believe it or not, chewing this stuff has reduced the amount of dental work needed for some of us. There is a noticeable difference between the smoothness of my teeth when I've been chewing blue, and when I've just sat around. Nifty, eh?

And who doesn't love the minty freshness of gum in their mouth? (Or in your neighbor's mouth for that matter.)

Shine Like a New Penny

Lincoln is the only person to be featured on a US coin for more than 100 years. His face was first featured in 1909, the 200th anniversary of his birth.


For the 150th birthday anniversary, the Lincoln Memorial penny was completed. I'm going to miss it; it was my favorite coin.


2009 is --you guessed it-- his 200th birthday, and this year these four penny designs will be issued. Have you seen them yet? I just saw the log-cabin this morning (which is how I found out about the new pennies in the first place).




According to Wikipedia, "in 2010, the cent's reverse will be redesigned again, with a new, permanent design being released into circulation. The redesign will bear an image that is emblematic of Lincoln's preservation of the United States as a single and united country. Lincoln will remain on the obverse, though a new obverse design is possible."

I really hope the 2010--foreseeable future penny isn't hideous.

Behold the Magazine-Ready Family

Photos by Nicole Carman

My brother, sister-in-law, and nephew look like they've just wandered from the pages of a pricey fashion catalog. Seriously, people! Matt, Heather-- I can't decide which of you is more attractive. Maybe Cole will win.

Films to Look Forward To

"Agora," is a movie coming out this December. It's apparently about an Egyptian female philosopher during the Roman Empire, and the uprising of Christianity. It's been labeled as an "historical epic," which makes me say HOO-RAY. Props to the poster; Rachel Weisz staring out to sea at the Pharos of Alexandria? My, what a lovely picture.

Hold to the Rod, the Lightning Rod

The "Oquirrh Mountain Temple," recently built by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, had a little mishap on Saturday night.

"Lightning struck the spire on the Oquirrh Mountain Temple on June 13th," said Scott Trotter, an LDS Church spokesman, in a prepared statement.

"No structural damage was reported; however, a black residue discolored the upper portion of the Angel Moroni statue. A work crew will re-gild the statue as soon as possible."

Photos by Steve Allison

"It comes in pints?!"

Behold the "Persimmon" Artisan Kitchenaid 5 quart mixer. Orange? Whazzah!

Deep Sea Diver, 1938

Modern Mechanix Magazine, Dec 1938

"Lead weighted shoes" and a "heavy steel diving helmet." Ahhhhh, those were the days.

All Hail Jewish Cake Lady

Rose Levy Beranbaum's Cake Bible uses a slightly different method to mix cake batter. Instead of the more common 'creaming' method where butter and sugar are creamed together first and then eggs are added, followed by flour and milk, Rose suggests this: combine all the dry ingredients first and to the dry stuff add soft butter along with a little milk. Then add the rest of the milk, vanilla, eggs, and what have you.

Why? AHA HA! (maniacal laughter continues)

Gluten. Gluten, which outside of bread making, is a deplorable word.

Rightly so-- gluten in a cake has a toughening affect. However. If butter coats all of the flour before the milk is added, it protects the flour and everything is mixed faster and blah blah blah--gluten production is diminished. To quote Rose, "the thing about this method is that it makes a cake that literally seems to melt-in-your-mouth and it has a very moist, dense, and velvety texture." Huzzah! Rose continues to say "the only downside to this is that the cake doesn't rise as much as usual." Boo hoo? I mean, come on, which do we prefer? A) Dry cake that's impressively tall, or B) what was that quote--ah yes--"moist, dense, velvety texture." Hmmmm. Tough question.

So now it's up to me to try this new methodology and stop gluten from bullying cake batter.

Buttercream Project #1: "Antoinette"

Usually there's an occasion for baking a cake like this. My purpose was simply to practice decorating, so choosing what words to pipe was somewhat new. What am I supposed to write, anyway? "Happy Un-birthday?" Lame! Laughing at myself I decided upon, "Let Them Eat Cake."

Everything you see here is buttercream frosting. Huzzah! No yucky fondant in my kitchen! This sugary glop was good enough to smack your lips on, and I had ever so much fun playing with it. I could barely contain myself. My roommates were all out, and I made happy use of my solitude listening to Claire de Lune and washing dishes. *sigh* I've spent so much time with friends lately, I'd forgotten how much I require and enjoy time to myself. Especially time alone in my kitchen. Nevermind-- back to the cake.

My "roses" need some extra practice. I made several dozen, going through pastry bag after pastry bag and refilling them over and over, just playing around, you know? Eventually I decided that I'd need to use a different (larger) petal tip to make roses, but that the one I was using (101 tip) was ideal for carnations. Besides, who's ever seen a carnation frosting flower on a cake? I think it's innovative and chic! Not to mention realistic, eh?

You're wondering how the buttercream looks so smooth? I combined the advice of several youtube decorators and SmittenKitchen: a "crumb coat" frosting layer to glue down pesky crumbs, adding a thicker top layer, and then using a flat bladed knife and wax paper to smooth it all down to this-could-be-Kansas-flat.

My other nifty trick was using a 5-point star tip instead of a 12. It makes ruffles instead of a shell; the result was less stuffy, less predictable, and slightly more romantic. Much preferred!

I let the cake sit overnight and brought it over to my sister-in-law's in the morning to make use of her camera. Also, I'm narcissistic and wanted her to gush about my lovely creation. (I can't shut up about how amazed I am that it turned out so well! Proud mother am I.) Anyway. While I was with Heather, playing with my adorable nephew, we decided to slice it open. Check out that edge! WHAHA!

Admit it-- you want to try some, don't you?

Last year "my birthday present to me" was the book SkyHigh; full of complicated recipes guaranteed to widen your eyes and make your mouth water. Things like "Chocolate-Hazelnut Nutcracker Cake," or "Banana Cake with Praline Filling and White Chocolate Ganache." Oy. My head is still reeling from my last attempt (at a Ginger-Lime cake) which was a near disaster.

This time I kept it simple-- I just wanted to practice frosting stuff! So I used a white box cake and added vanilla. A box cake can be delicious IF and ONLY IF you know my mother's nifty little secrets, of which there are many. Tee hee.

I pronounce buttercream project #1 to be a success. "Antoinette" is a light, summery, tasty confection. Come on over if you'd like a slice!

Emotion

"I struggled to find words to name the feelings that flooded through me, but I had no words strong enough to hold them. For a long moment, I drowned in them.

When I surfaced, I was not the same man I had been."

--Midnight Sun, Stephenie Meyer

Prose Master

"He would make a lovely corpse."

"Reflect upon your present blessings of which every man has many - not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some."

"There are books of which the backs and covers are by far the best parts."

"This is a world of action, and not for moping and droning in."

"It opens the lungs, washes the countenance, exercises the eyes, and softens down the temper; so cry away."

"Papa, potatoes, poultry, prunes and prism, are all very good words for the lips."

"There are strings in the human heart that had better not be vibrated."

"There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast."

"We forge the chains we wear in life."

(and my personal favorite) "To conceal anything from those to whom I am attached is not in my nature. I can never close my lips where I have opened my heart."

Charles Dickens

Politically Correct

In 1949 the Crayola factory first produced the "flesh" colored crayon. Civil rights actions led to the company changing the color's name to "peach" in 1962. Isn't that just peachy.


For more history of discontinued crayons, visit the factmonster.

Missed the Tony's? Watch these and you haven't.

I deliver unto you all the goods from the Tony's, and none of the boring crap. Merry Christmas.

A little microphone difficulty is taken in stride...Nicely. (Nicely? *snort*) Guys and Dolls starring Oliver Platt as Nathan Detroit and Lauren Graham (from Gilmore Girls) as Adelaide? Fact.

Dig the choreography! Check how many Jerome Robbins bits you can find. Nifty tidbit of information-- every "Shark" in the cast is 100% genuine Puerto Rican.

Hello, lyrics.

The "swan lake" sequence of Billy Elliot where the kid flies on a wire is much prettier, but this number would carry a heavy weight of emotional impact into the audience. I can't believe the Billy's keep up this performance multiple times a day.

For the brief showcase of EVERYTHING at the Tony's, including the fun spats of Hair and 9 to 5, refer to this, the opening number of the program.

HORROR!

I found this in my fridge this morning. MY FRIDGE! Aaaah! 10 wrist slaps to whichever of my roommates is responsible for the presence of this abomination in my abode.
I don't know what to say first; either that "nonfat" and "margarine" seem exclusive to each other, or to laugh at how people could believe SmartSqueeze will aide their quest for health.

Don't you find it peculiar that with all the hype about eating organic veggies, whole-grains, all natural items, things with no preservatives, and otherwise edible foodstuffs humans haven't tampered with that there could exist something as far out there as NONFAT MARGARINE SQUEEZE SPREAD?

This near-liquid substance is not recommended for baking or frying. Why? Because according to user recommendations, it does not melt. Now let me just say this--anything that won't melt in a 500° skillet is not going to break down inside your body. But don't you worry! With its greasy residue, I'm certain SmartSqueeze will leave a tar-like substance behind as it passes: a gift for your colon to forever cherish.

Did I forget to mention? SmartSqueeze is gluten free! Hooray! Wait, what? Oh yeah. So is butter.

Best of the Tony's 2009: NEXT TO NORMAL

The new show on the block this year is Next to Normal, nominee for Best Musical and winner of Best Score, Best Leading Actress, and Set Design for the Tony Awards this year. (Billy Elliot might have won "best" new musical-- but hey, Ragtime and Wicked didn't win the "best" Tony either so we know the prize isn't everything.)

N2N's score is exactly what I like to hear and sing: deeply emotional, crystal clear mix placement, and goosebump raising harmonies. Top songs are "Superboy and the Invisible Girl," "Everything Else," and "You Don't Know/I Am the One."

The plot is blowing my mind: so different, so emotional, so stunning! Diana, the main character, is a mother suffering from bi-polar disorder and believes the illusion that her son is alive-- though he's been deceased years. Diana's son haunts her life and influences both her own daily decisions, and emotionally wounds the rest of the family: Diana's devoted husband and adolescent daughter who vainly tries to gain attention (insert "Superboy and the Invisible Girl" here for graphic irony).

With a script that includes things like "thank you, Doctor; Valium is my favorite color" and "these are a few of my favorite pills," Next to Normal has fully captured my interest.

P.S. You can keep Adam Lambert, Joni. I'd much rather take Aaron Tveit. ;)

Philosopher Emperor

Caesar Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, "The Wise"

"Anger cannot be dishonest."

"Because your own strength is unequal to the task, do not assume that it is beyond the powers of man; but if anything is within the powers and province of man, believe that it is within your own compass also."

"Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present."